Final conclusions from the Tech Director's Desk:
As this plot suggests, no statistically significant correlation linking attractiveness to sexiness of sound appears to exist. The sample considered during this study was extensive, spanning musical genre, country of origin and era, ranging from Phoenix – SO attractive, super sexy sounding and too trendy for their own good – to Twisted Sister and Bret Michaels (born Bret Michael Sychak, i.e. he even changed his name and it’s still not that cool) – neither sexy sounding nor even really all that attractive (though Rock of Love is pretty fantastic). Attractiveness (independent axis) is normalized to The Polyphonic Spree (with some 40+ members, there has to be a pretty Gaussian distribution of looks), sexiness of sound to John Cougar Mellencamp (really, I couldn’t decide). Interestingly, 00s Bon Jovi: slightly more attractive, a bit less sexy sounding than 80s Bon Jovi (It’s My Life has NOTHING on Always. Never has, never will.), whereas Bruce Springsteen circa 1975 (Rosie, come out tonight!) is SO much more attractive and significantly more sexy sounding than Bruce Springsteen circa 1985 (NB, Bruce of ’85 is of course still considerably attractive and indeed so sexy sounding). Any uncertainty as to the validity of the above is easily resolved by referring to any part of the Hammersmith Odeon show. T-Pain sits above average wrt sexiness of sound for his sparing and well-placed use of Autotune (and cause I’m on a Boat hits so hard in all the right places). Blink-182 is just so hot (see: What’s My Age Again music video), but alas, not all too sexy sounding. Same for Greg Brady.
Stevie Wonder is in a class all by himself.
So the results are a touch inconclusive, but satisfying nonetheless. Also, do note: the Bon Jovi pic came from coolmenshair.com. That says it all.